Keeping Me Alive

Greenville – December, 1963

When I was in my late 20s, I almost went to Europe on a business trip.  The company had all the reservations and I had my plane ticket in hand.  However, the day before the flight they said, “never mind . . .” Yeah, I was disappointed.

In preparation for that trip, I needed a U.S. Passport.  One of the requirements is a certified copy of your birth certificate.  I always had the pretty one from the hospital, but never had a certified copy.  South Carolina was pretty efficient and for the right fee had a copy to me overnight. 

I read the certificate in detail and found one detail that was a small surprise.

Question:

     “16. PREVIOUS DELIVERIES TO MOTHER

          c. How many fetal deaths (fetuses born dead at ANY time after conception)?”

Answer:

     “2.”

This was a only small surprise because I knew that Mom had two stillbirths after I was born, but I didn’t know of any stillbirths or miscarriages before I was born. 

I asked Dad about it.  He answered, “I finally had to make her get her tubes tied.  I got tired of burying babies. Before you came along, I came home from work and found her and your brother and sister gone.  She told me later that she was headed to visit her family in Baltimore.  She was pregnant and had a miscarriage along the way. She stopped and put D and D in a motel with enough food for a couple of days and went to the hospital.” 

Mom left my brother and sister alone in a motel and went to the hospital for a miscarriage.  D and D were  two years apart in age and were under the age of six.  Mom didn’t tell Dad she was even leaving for this road trip and didn’t call him for help.  She told him about the miscarriage after she got home. 

I have vague memories about the two stillbirths that occurred after I was born. I remember Mom going off to the hospital for several days a couple of times. During the day I stayed at a nearby daycare, probably in someone’s home.  I remember her being gone for days(?) and I remember all the neat toys to play with at that daycare.  I also remember visiting the graves of my brother and sister, Devin and Denine Green. 

 

My mother kept having miscarriages and stillbirths because of Rh sensitization.  This causes a condition called hemolytic anemia where the mother’s Rh negative blood creates antibodies that destroy the fetus’ positive red blood cells faster than they can be replaced. 

My blood type is O+ and hemolytic anemia almost killed me. 

I was born on Friday the 13^th, December 1963. I was 5 lbs. 13 oz. at birth, anemic and yellow with jaundice.  To save my life I needed blood transfusions.  Dad told me that I had an IV in my head and an IV in my foot, one taking blood out and the other putting fresh blood in. 

I remember him telling me that the doctor told him “don’t  get attached to this baby – he won’t make it past six months.”  I guess he got a little attached because he didn’t give up.  He said that he would feed me coke and crackers, that was the only thing I could keep down.  This was the 60s and so I don’t know whether they even tried to breast-feed me.

Knowing that blood transfusions are what saved my life when I was born, I am a regular blood donor.  I started when I was 17 years old and still donate three or four times a year.  

Oddly enough, Dad never understood donating blood. He sneered at the thought and said, “if they want my blood, they’ll have to pay me.”